The First Rule of BOOK CLUB ...

I’ve never been to a book club meeting before so can’t offer any help, but that all sounds very slapdash!

I've been a member of two other book groups before my current one.  Both of the first two I was in for less than a year but I've already been in my current one for about 5 years so that says it all!

The first group was run along the lines of the one you describe, through a Meet Up website (although I don't think it existed as an App back then - about 12 years ago).  Therefore all the members were strangers to each other.  It was ok but I felt that people were there to meet other people, not necessarily to share a love of reading.  There was no book swapping/gifting at all and nothing outside the "read" book got discussed.

At the second group, this was mostly made up of friends of friends.  One of the members, Sally,  had put some info on a general website and that was how I found them and asked to join.  I was the first and only member who joined this way and some of the established members weren't exactly welcoming.  Members took it in turns to choose a book and Sally would do her best to find cheap copies through Amazon Marketplace etc. We would meet up in a pub and have a meal and about 1/3 of the time would be talking about the book and the other 2/3 about other stuff, a lot of which I wasn't interested in because I wasn't friends with everyone.

Whilst I was in that group I overheard a conversation in Waitrose between 2 staff members.  They were discussing arrangements for their reading group and so I asked.  They invited me to join.  It was a library run group, at a library in the neighbouring town.  When I had initially applied at my local library I was told they had a waiting list.  However, this group didn't operate such a thing because, unless the numbers got ridiculous, why should it matter how many members there are!  Anyway, I joined the group and it was great.  The library provided the books FOC; one of the members also wrote to publishers and got sets of review copies for free as long as some of us put reviews on line; they arranged for authors to visit the group.  After a couple of years, the lady who ran the group for the library was changing jobs and the library said they couldn't host the group anymore but if we could find another venue they would still support us with books.  So we moved to a pub in walking distance of my house   where they have quiet back room; the pub put on pots of tea and coffee which we pay £1 each for (or of course can buy a drink from the bar).  The group is brilliant.  Still some members from original library group and we now have a library member of staff with us again so he brings new members along who still can't join a library group because of the dreaded waiting lists.  The library produce lists of reading group sets which they have, we pass the list around and tick any which we think sound interesting and then the library provide them to us, one set per month.  We never know what order they are coming in but that's ok as it's nice to be a surprise. 

A few people already know each other as friends/colleagues/family etc but some, like me, come on their own.  We do lend/borrow and pass on books between us but we've never done Secret Santa.  We've only had one author visit us since moving to the pub but I guess we are more independent so it's up to us to make the effort to contact someone.

As for discussion, we usually go around the table taking it in turn to give our own personal review of the book.  People can chip in when appropriate but everyone gets their turn and no opinions are argued with or dismissed. Once everyone has spoken (and everyone has to speak) we then chat about the book as a group, maybe picking up on any points raised in the individual reviews.

Also, no one is told off if they haven't read the book which I have heard of happening at some groups.

We love it when a book has a gritty subject matter which invites a general discussion such as mental health, grief, religion etc.  And again, those discussions are all friendly with no one feeling their opinion is wrong.

I love it!

It does, I'd consider joining that one!

Perhaps I should have stated that the Book they all had differing issues with was ..

Chernobyl Prayer by Svetlana Alexievich

Seemingly a rather harrowing book of monologues by survivors of the disaster .. I don't think I want to add it to my reading list anyway .. younger members, who weren't even born at that time, had great difficulties with it

I've never been to an IRL book club, and from the sound of it not sure I would like to either. I suppose if I had a relatively tight-knit group where we actually cared about each other, and happened to share reading as a hobby then it would be OK but I don't really deal well with the pressure of "you have to read this, get far enough to have thoughts / discussion points and then try to evaluate others thoughts in a discussion". I appreciate its a good thing, and many people do enjoy that, it's just not for me. May be because I'm also a bit shy and find it hard to speak up in a group discussion.

Re: wishlist though, I've never been one to keep a wishlist simply because it's too easy (especially with all those adverts on the browser these days!) to just add and add and add without actually thinking things through. I get the idea of having a small list of things I really want, but there are so few books that fit that category these days since I allocated myself a hobby budget. If I really want a particular book, which is rare in itself (there are many books I want, but very few that I really want), I usually just buy it. Perhaps I'm still in the phase of diversifying my reading, and this is one thing that those blinking adverts are rubbish at - they just recommend stuff that's almost identical to what I just read!

I've been a member of a bookcircle (round robin) rather than a book group. We meet once a month between September and June. Each member hosts one meeting with tea and cakes.
In June each member suggests a book for the next season, there is a discussion and sometimes a choice gets changed.
Given the format we don't discuss the circle books until end of June, when we have a discussion and evaluation of all books read. We talk about other books or other things, since we've got to know each other quite well.
We also lend books outside the circle.

I'm lucky that members are friendly so even if I don't like all of the books I always enjoy the meetings. Also, we read english books and speak english at the meetings.

My second Book Club meet was last Wednesday, when we reviewed The Bees by Laline Paull ..

There were supposed to be 14 of us, but in the end only 8 turned up .. that being the case, there were 3 new people who I didn't meet last month (including the main organiser) .. 

I enjoyed this meeting so much more because I was more relaxed ..

Having met some of the attendees before, I knew what to expect, had read the book and was prepared .. everyone was very friendly and the book chat was focused, but also light hearted .. all were confident in putting their points of view across and polite in listening to everyone else's too ..

I was in the minority as the others did enjoy the book much more than I did, but the discussion was lively and they could see my reasoning .. many of the points raised were very interesting and the more we chatted, the more I realised that I got more from the book that I originally thought .. still not converted to Fantasy genre though ..

It is true what some of you said before, a couple of the attendees only read one or two books per month .. 

In conclusion, it was a very good evening out, lots of good chat and a laugh .. I didn't say anything controversial     so I think they may have me back again ..

The next book is Frankenstein, which I read for Halloween, and although the meeting is 'booked-up' and I'm on the waiting list, with people cancelling at the last minute, I might as well pop along anyway !!